Austin PD Using Buses to crack down on Cell Phone use while driving

In early 2015, a law banning the use of cell phones while driving a car went into effect here in Austin, Texas. While effective, Lieutenant Jerry Gonzalez says a poll done by local news station KEYE shows that it could be enforced better. Instead, they’re using city buses to monitor.

 

“Bad Boys Bad Boys, Whatcha gonna do?”

 

While very effective, with 40 tickets written in 2 1/2 hours, this is very invasive of our privacy, and seems like a way for the police department to write more tickets, or even give you jail time for any other vehicular activities you partake in. While this law is not as effective as it should be, this is the complete wrong way of going about it. Show people how much of a fucking dummy they are if they text and drive in the first place rather than monitor me.

 

12 Motorcycle units corresponded with spotters on CapMetro buses who would report back with the vehicle’s information. They would call to the nearest unit and that officer would make the stop. Drive safe out there friends.

“Breaker Breaker got a smokey on my tail, come on back now”

Why “Black Lives Matter” Protesters Support Hill Dawg and her crew

Sunday evening, the three democratic Nominees lined up on stage to debate their plans if they were to become the next President of the United States. One topic that came up numerous times was the Civil rights of minorities.

“The first thing I’ll do? WHITE SLAVERY!”

For some reason, “Black Lives Matters” protesters have been giving large amounts of support to Hilary, saying that Bernie Sanders has never done anything with his power to help the civil rights movement.

Clinton opened the debate, saying:

“You know, I remember well when my youth minister took me to hear Dr. King. I was a teenager. And his moral clarity, the message that he conveyed that evening really stayed with me and helped to set me on a path to service. I also remember that he spent the last day of his life in Memphis, fighting for dignity and higher pay for working people.”

Hill Dawg proved to be nothing but another political hack in today’s fucked up government. She is feeding the masses what they want to hear, and it’s getting out of hand. Multiple times in the debate, I noticed how she could take a topic like gun control, and all of a sudden turn it into a racial issue. I agree that black lives do matter, they matter just as much as my life, my parent’s lives, my brother’s life, and everyone else in the world who is lucky enough to be alive. The term “oppression” is being thrown around nowadays so carelessly, that someone can find a lamp oppressive.

 

“And she still got love for the streets, she da HIL-AR-Y”

These people aren’t fighting to have equal rights for themselves, they are fighting to be recognized out the ass for being black, making it seem like the most amazing thing ever that in 2016, a black man can do the same thing as a white man. In fact, Hill Dawg fought with Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and was arrested in 1962 for peacefully protesting Jim Crowe laws. Oh shit, that was actually BERNIE FUCKING SANDERS. Although I agree that there is still racism strong within America, I believe that some things are getting quite out of hand with rights. Black Lives Matter protesters are the Feminazi’s of African-American rights. They don’t just want rights, they want everyone else to recognize those rights and celebrate the shit out of them, instead of living as equal humans

“Just so you guys are clear, I’m only doing this so that I can beat the fuck out of Hill Dawg 50 years from now”

Bernie Sanders has a huge background in fighting for the rights of African Americans. While Hilary was listening, Bernie was doing. He was there fighting so that in 2016, you aren’t getting hosed down by firehose wielding policemen, or having dogs sicked on you because you’re black. He is one of the reasons that you have equal opportunities as I do.

Columbia: Prepare to toke up! (If you’re sick and all)

Columbia’s President Santos signed a decree last Tuesday legalizing weed for medicinal purposes.

Fuck Yes.

Santos states, “Allowing the use of marijuana does not go against our international commitments to control drugs or against our policy of fighting drug trafficking,”

 

“We got more things to worry about… *SNIFF* NOW WE HAVE EVERYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT! AHHH!”

 

So get ready to toke up Columbia!

But only if you’re sick. The decree allows therapeutic use of the plant and lets you have up to 20 grams and 20 personal plants growing at one time.

“I swear Officer, it’s all for personal use!”

This decree will hopefully influence the United States, and other countries around the world to let us blaze that KrAzY KU$$$$$H without having to worry about cops busting down your door, shooting your dog, tasing your wife and flashbanging your toddler all for smoking a little bit of weed.

“Quit being a bitch, this is some dank ass shit kid”

 

Marijuana still remains a 100% illegal substance in 16 states, excluding states that allow CBD oil only. This needs to change, and it needs to change soon. The pharma lobby doesn’t want you to consume such a “Dangerous drug” so they can profit off of their dangerous drugs. The Fuel industry, paper industry, textile industry, food industry and more lobby against legalization of Hemp and Cannabis due to the fact that they will lose some of the billions of dollars they’ve made all while buying out our government . Fucking legalize it.

 

 

BLACK DEATH IS BACK

This is black Friday.  In America, we say fuck God,  the holidays are over this weekend and it’s time for us to shop for the upcoming Christmas holiday,  similar to what Jesus Christ was doing around this time of year;  it’s chaos in the streets as the clock strikes 12 and the sweaty Walmart employee hastily unlocks the doors and runs for his life as the mob of overweight, handicapped, and the hive mind of America rushes through the doors killing or injuring anybody in their way whether it be a child or an elderly.

mmm

Although the deals may be good and the “holiday” is known for stimulating our economy just in time for the end of year. Is the damage and death really worth it?  The fact that there’s a website with the domain blackfridaydeathcount.com telling me that since 2006 there has been a total of 7 deaths and 98 injuries on the day after Thanksgiving as people are going out and shopping for gifts for their loved ones. Maybe if I explain things simply they will make more sense of chaos that is black Friday.

 

A few weeks into the month of November is when participating stores start advertising black Friday deals, Christmas ads playing during Sunday night football, giant highway billboards. Citizens aren’t to blame as these companies invest millions into getting them hyped up to enjoy these special “deals”.  Come thanksgiving day when the stress of the cooking has finally settled down,  the stress from the family begins to rise,  the alcoholic beverages are downed so the family can cope together,  and finally,  by the time the Cowboys are done getting their asses kicked and the grandparents are passed out on the couch it’s time to finally get out the trailer park and go shopping! Mothers bringing their daughters to help carry one more half off toaster ovens.

 

Alright for fucks sake America.  I mean God damn,  every year two days after Thanksgiving all the rest of us normal non lunatics have to hear the news from our allied countries about how absolutely mad we are when it comes to mob mentality and overreacting to capitalistic media hype.  For once I’m asking my country to learn from it’s silly mistakes. I hereby reach out and give my country a slap on the wrist as it deserves a much more rude awakening.

INITIATIVE AGAINST THE HOMELESS

Seriously though, this shit is fucked and we need to help out our species.

You could probably live without a phone, lots of people go without cars, friends, computers. Any one of you could adjust to a lifestyle without these luxuries. Imagine tomorrow you no longer had any of these things, also no place to call home, no money, and no family to call. You can’t get a job because you have no residence or you have a disability. If you have a disability you can’t get treatment because you can’t get healthcare because you can’t get a job. Your only income is the money you can panhandle or beg from people, God willing you aren’t addicted to anything or have any debts.

Any night of the week in Austin Texas there is an estimated 2,300 locals (austintx.gov) with no roof over their head and no familiar faces to grant them a home. Most of these people have known homelessness for far too long or are mentally disabled to a point that may be off-putting to most, maybe to you they just fucked up in life or are doing it to themselves, but what about that mindset, maybe that’s the cause of their disease, the stereotype given to the “losers” or the “failures”. What’s to stop us from helping each other? Don’t we all live here together? I’m not the only one that gets that feeling when pulling up to a light and seeing a homeless person. All i’m asking is that we help a brother when he’s down. You feel me?

Aside from dumping all your loose change into their hands there are so many things you can do, even conversing with them is one of those options. If you’re already the type to hand the guy a few bucks you are already doing more than most, what I believe is even better and ANYONE can do is giving supplies; food, rather than cash. Those boots you never wear, the blanket that’s been in storage for years, flashlights, duct tape, clothes, canned food, sleeping bags, tents, gift cards, books, crack, job applications. These items that most people have lying around but never get used can simply be placed in your car and the next time you come to that dreaded stoplight you can smile and feel good about your useless self as you might be making this person’s day, even if it’s not something they need, it’ll always be the gesture that counts.

Most importantly in mostly every major city there are resources dedicated to helping the homeless. Austin has the Habitat For Humanity, FrontSteps, Lifeworks, Foundation For The Homeless, Austin Children’s Center, GreenDoors… There’s a shit load. Simply stopping to talk to one of these homeless people you may learn that this person has no knowledge of these places. We can INFORM the homeless in our city and the willing will be able to find help, we just need to help give each other hope as humans, sometimes that’s all it takes.

BACON IS DEAD

All the meats are poison.

DON’T EAT THAT! EAT THIS! IT’S BETTER FOR MY WALLET! Oh I mean your health.

Since like, forever (maybe the 60s) there’s been scientific articles coming out telling you what you should eat. Every few years we’ll find out that this list of foods WILL kill you. Or we get a list simply saying “Oh we were wrong about these things killing you” and normally we’re all relieved since we had never stopped eating the supposed poison in the first place. Good on us.

So if we keeping being told what’s healthy and what’s not and even the scientist’s end up being wrong most of the time, should we even listen to them in the first place?

Processed meats are going to kill you! Suddenly everyone erupts into chaos vowing to go vegan and boycott every meat packer (double meaning unintended) in the country. A scientific article comes out saying that artificially enhanced foods may cause cancer. No shit. Obviously artificial anything is most likely not going to be a good thing to eat. When humans came into existence there was no process in between cutting and cooking the meat, and when they figured out what packaging was there was no process in between that and involved genetics or various chemicals. This is because we are meaty animals just like the creatures we consume. There is no need to genetically modify or produce any food that isn’t completely organic. It’s probably why we’re so fucking fat these days.

Instead humans have recently become super market dependent, along with being media dependent. At this point we become almost completely manipulated by the store owners and the companies funding the research that then skews our decisions when choosing what to put into OUR bodies.

Fucking think for yourself you asshole.

Socially Fucked

  In February of 2007, a social networking website called Tumblr made it onto the web. Hipsters, Feminists, LBGT activists all flooded the website with their personal political views on everything. As years went by, things started getting sour…


    

“All Men are Created Equal”

      

    Social Justice Warriors (SJW’s) are people on the internet who do nothing but jump all over people for small shit, and act like it’s the end of the world. Some people even get butthurt over someone eating food from another culture. It is to the point today that colleges and other institutions are having to make “Safe Spaces” and implement “Trigger Warnings” because people are afraid of words. They preach equality but segregate themselves more and more, and end up scaring themselves of the world we live in. It’s cancerous to our society. Social Justice has even made its way out of Tumblr and into other communities, causing a lot of uproar over bullshit that doesn’t even matter in real life.

“It’s my Hot Air industrial strength hairdryer AND I’M GETTING TRIGGERED WITHOUT IT!”

 

I understand that it sucks major dicks when people are major dicks to you, but it doesn’t mean it’s the end of the fucking world people. It’s all about growing up, being an adult, and making progress in your society. Most of them call themselves “Progressive” yet keep us from moving forward. If you really think about it, SJW’s are just as much of ignorant, paranoid fuckhead’s as the people who are occupying a fucking bird sanctuary, calling themselves a “militia” over someone’s cows.  They’re no different.

Out of all of the bullshit SJW’s post on social media, the worst part is the actual activism that comes of it. People are actually fighting to have safe spaces, trigger warnings, enforcing correct pronoun use. One college campus even had to change their Chinese style foods because people were fucking butthurt over something that doesn’t even fucking matter.

“DROP THE SWEET AND SOUR PORK AND STEP AWAY FROM THE BUFFET LINE YOU MOTHERFUCKER!”

Millennials aren’t entitled, it’s SJW’s that make adults think that. There are some ignorant motherfuckers out there, but there will always be that spark to ignite the flame in our generation.